Chapter 7

Time starts now

I went inside the airport gates after saying goodbye to him and my brother. It was hard. Very hard. It felt like I was leaving behind a very important part of mine there. I didn’t look back and went straight forward to the counter because I knew they would still be there, looking at me. One of the most difficult moment while leaving someone at the airport is to look back and wave at them. It requires courage. I didn’t have it.

‘You didn’t even look at me. I was waving you goodbye’ his texted me.

How do I make him understand that I wanted to but I couldn’t? It was hard. Damn harder than anything else.

‘Call me when you are done with your baggage and security. I will be waiting.’ He texted.

I smiled, ‘okay’.

I passed the baggage and security and called him while sitting in the waiting area. We talked. Normally. Nothing too emotional yet. 

‘I have to board’ I said to him. 

‘Okay. Be safe. Have a good journey. I love you’ he replied

I got into my flight and connected the Wi-Fi and called him again before taking off. I had to. He was all I was thinking about. I always wanted to be connected to him. Always talk to him. Listen to him. He reached his flat in the meantime. Got into pjs and his black t-shirt. His famous BLACK T-SHIRT. That was the first time I saw that t-shirt on him. His big arms showing off. He looked so irresistible in that. That was the first time I saw him in a half sleeve t-shirt because then, summers were going to be started there. The sleeves of his t-shirt were fixed around his big arms. The arms that were meant to be my pillow forever, if we weren’t living a thousand miles away from each other. 

‘You look handsome in this t-shirt.’ I complemented him.

He smiled. He smiled big time; I even have a screenshot of him smiling too much just because I told him that some t-shirt is looking good at him. Men are really simple!

‘Its my favorite t-shirt. I wear this every day.’ He replied. 

Little did I know that he literally wears that same t-shirt every-single-day. At first, I thought, everyone has a favorite cloth – a top or a t-shirt that is very old but very much comfortablethat one never wants to throw away and wears very frequently. But every day? Oh My God. It has been 5 months today, when I came back from home, and he has worn that t-shirt for more than 4 and a half months. I swear I will definitely steal that t-shirt from him the next time I am going home not only because it would look good at me, obviously, but also because only then he would wear some other colored clothes that exist in this world. 

‘I have to take off’, I said, ‘I will talk to you soon’

‘Okay. Be safe. I love you.’ He replied.

I kept my phone aside and got comfortable in my seat. I ate something and then rested my head on my pillow. I closed my eyes and there he was, in front of me. How? I don’t know. And I can’t explain as well. I literally felt him. I was crying. Again. Not out loud, of course, because I was in a plane, around so many people. But I couldn’t resist. This was the first time I was feeling something like that. Like I wanted someone near me. I wanted that someone to kiss me. I wanted that someone to hug me and tell me that every thing is okay. That I moved abroad, so far away from everyone for a reason. I felt overwhelmed. I replayed our first kiss in my head and my heart and felt asleep. I woke up after an hour and connected to the Wi-Fi. I messaged him. The things we talked about in that one hour were insane. He was emotional. I was emotional. Everything felt like falling apart and getting into place at the same time. It was the first time I saw that emotional side of him. We are so alike. Damn

I told him how different it was for me to leave from the first time I left. How unexpectedly he became such an important part of my life. How surprisingly, I found the perfect guy for myself and then God decided to put us in long distance. “Good things take time” my mom always told me. I never realized it applies to people as well. “If something is meant for you, it will come to you in the right time.” But no one told me that in that right time I would fall in love with someone without even tasting his touch. His touch of course made me felt like a precious princess but at what cost? So, you are telling me that I finally have my person but I can’t see him every day? That I can’t touch him every day? That I can’t grab his arm and go to shopping every day. That I can’t go hand in hand with him and eat ice cream with him every day? How am Isupposed to be an understanding person when all I want to be is his clingy girlfriend every day? I want him to see all my faces, and I have many, FYI! I can be a self-sufficient woman, confident, focused, strong and feisty but I can also be a clingy girlfriend, moody, sad, angry, excited, lovable, unreasonable and that too all at once. Now that I think about it, I think I do have the multiple personality disorder. Who would ever love me? Oh wait, someone already does. HAHAH (victory laugh)! Too bad we get to do this over the rectangular screens but too good that I got to do all this with him. I tried to cheer him up but he got too emotional. 

He wasn’t even able talk to me because he was missing me too much. Do these kinds of men really exist? In this world? And I was lucky enough to find one? We talked too much about the time we had together and about the million nights we will have now, being far away rom each other. The time starts now! It wouldn’t be easy. It was different when we hadn’t met. But now? Now that we had felt what it feels like to be with a right person, I don’t think I would ever be able to forget what he tastes like. What his hugs taste like. What his kisses taste like. What his hands on my waist taste like. What it feels like when he looks at me before kissing me. What the food tastes like when he feeds me with his own hands. What his lips feel like when he kisses my neck. What his hands feel like when he holding my face. What his touch feels like grabs my hand in the middle of the street. What his presence feels like when he just exists around me. The few kisses we had would be with me until my lips meet his again. 

Long story short, now that it has been five months away from him after I tasted what love feels like, I realize that “People say that distance kills love; but I have never tasted anything sweeter than his voice across the miles.”

I kissed him good night over the text, kept my phone aside, closed my eyes, and there he was, again, grabbing my waist and kissing me